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Messages - chiisu81

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Dungeon World / Re: PDF For Sale
« on: March 07, 2014, 05:01:39 PM »
I've emailed DTRPG; in the color PDF the text is corrupt.

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I'm really against any more editing (there are like, thousands of PDFs distributed across multiple websites and it seems silly to do addendums now). I was considering either a follow-up or submitting to the e-zine.

Perhaps it could be offered for free download via DTRPG/RPGNow, that way if there's any further edits/fixes we'll be notified...

Is the source text file available for our own edits?

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I posted this DW Guide feedback on the RPG.net forums, figured I'd post it here as well:

Ok I've read and digested the DW Guide; the combat example at the end was perfect, by that point I was able to follow along and realize I would probably do similar things the GM did. And on page 52, "How big are the rubies": I totally laughed out loud at that, considering it was the Wizard asking rather than the Thief!

In return for this amazing guide, I humbly offer some editing feedback (for an eventual 1.3 update perhaps?):

Page 2: 3rd paragraph, 3rd sentence, extra space between "be" and "confusing"
Page 3: 1st paragraph, put a ";" after "Deal Damage" instead of ","
Page 5: 1st paragraph, 1st sentence, there's an extra "."
Page 5: 1st paragraph, 3rd sentence, remove "it" before "tells", change "tells" to "telling"
Page 6: 2nd boxed area, need a space between "an" and ""immediate"
Page 7: bottom of boxed area, need a space between "-1" and "forward"
Page 8: near bottom of boxed area, change "," after location to ".", add another space, and capitalize "they're"
Page 11: near end of 3rd paragraph, is "some thing" meant to be 2 words or "something"?
Page 11: boxed area, change all ", what do you do?"s to ". What do you do?"
Page 12: at the top, in the first 2 sentences, there are 2 extra "the"s
Page 12: 1st paragraph, 4th sentence, change "," after counterattack to ";"
Page 12: 1st paragraph, 3rd-to-last sentence, change ";" after one to ".", and another space, and capitalize "this"
Page 14-17, 19, 27-33: capitalize all instances of "move" to ensure consistency
Page 15: 2nd paragraph, "determining" mis-spelled
Page 19: 2nd paragraph, 5th sentence, replace "," after "moves"(another needed capitalization) with ";"
Page 19: end of 2nd paragraph, capitalize "xp"
Page 24: boxed area, 2nd sentence, change "," after points to "." and add another space
Page 24: boxed area, 2nd Cleric statement, change "." after "6" to ","
Page 27: 4th paragraph, 3rd sentence, remove "," after "moves"(another needed capitalization)
Page 27: last sentence, replace "might actually work" with "applies"?
Page 29: 1st full paragraph, replace "," after "move"(another needed capitalization) with ";"
Page 29: last paragraph, bold "The Supreme Court"
Page 30: top, bold "The Supreme Court"
Page 31: 3rd paragraph, change ";" after "choose" to ":"
Page 32: 1st paragraph, capitalize second "you"
Page 37: Need a blank line before the 1st full paragraph
Page 37: 3rd full paragraph, 4th sentence, capitalize "cast"
Page 58: 2nd line, need a space between "simple" and "and"
Page 59: 2nd line, extra space between "and" and "campaign"?
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Page 36: first full paragraph, you kinda skip over whether Dangers and Portent are actually what make up Fronts, or if all 3 are seperate-but-related

Page 37: Cast is barely mentioned, can you expand/elaborate?

Possible to have page numbers added to the bottom or top-right of the pages?

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I've already posted on RPG.net, but I wanted to re-iterate here how much this DW Guide has helped myself, a longtime D&D/D20 player, understand the way DW/AW works.  Simply amazing, and I'll be spreading the word!

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