Custom Move critique

When the mighty metal minotaur charges you, roll +Dex

On a 10+, you avoid him no problem and his vulnerability is momentarily exposed.

On a 7-9, he is exposed and choose one:

• You are trampled underneath, take 1d10 damage
• The minotaur gores you with his rune-etched horns, doing 1d6 damage and healing himself the same amount
• You are knocked back and into the air, momentarily stunned with the wind knocked out of you

Thoughts?

Oooh, Great Monster Kevin!
I assume that one of his moves is 'Charge a group of enemies with abandon'? and that he has the tags forceful, messy and piercing?

I think its a wonderful move but the wording to me seems a little directive, and possibly hard to trigger as a move...

The trigger ties in with the 10+ result without being explicit. The 10+ result assumes that the player wants to avoid the charge (no problem) and expose a weakness. So maybe:
When you try and avoid the mighty metal minotaur's thunderous charge, roll +Dex
Or even:
When you stand firm against the mighty Metal Minotaur's Murderous Charge attempting to reveal his weakness, roll +Wis
That way its triggered as a specific player action (rather than a GM Move), and is inherently divergent from either Defy Danger or Defend or even Discern Realities... it also does snowball rather nicely from the Minotaur's Move (attack) I suggested above :)

Now the 10+ gives the player their intent and opens the fiction for another move too (based on the minotaur's vulnerability - nice!)

With the 7-9 result I would just give the options, and write in the Minotaur's 'exposure' as one of the choices. Thus:

On a 7-9, choose one:

*You are trampled underneath, take 1d10 damage, but you expose a weakness, what is it?
*You get in real near to a position of advantage, but the minotaur gores you with his rune-etched horns, doing 1d6 damage and healing himself the same amount.
*You are knocked back and into the air, landing in a place of safety. You are momentarily stunned with the wind knocked out of you.



 

Oooh, Great Monster Kevin!
I assume that one of his moves is 'Charge a group of enemies with abandon'? and that he has the tags forceful, messy and piercing?

I think its a wonderful move but the wording to me seems a little directive, and possibly hard to trigger as a move...

The trigger ties in with the 10+ result without being explicit. The 10+ result assumes that the player wants to avoid the charge (no problem) and expose a weakness. So maybe:
When you try and avoid the mighty metal minotaur's thunderous charge, roll +Dex
Or even:
When you stand firm against the mighty Metal Minotaur's Murderous Charge attempting to reveal his weakness, roll +Wis
That way its triggered as a specific player action (rather than a GM Move), and is inherently divergent from either Defy Danger or Defend or even Discern Realities... it also does snowball rather nicely from the Minotaur's Move (attack) I suggested above :)

Now the 10+ gives the player their intent and opens the fiction for another move too (based on the minotaur's vulnerability - nice!)

I really like the idea of a custom move for an enemy. It gives the encounter a different and unique feel and the monster his really special then.

I agree with noofy. Changing the wording of the trigger so that it comes from a player's choice of action is a great idea.

Maybe give a +1 forward with the 10+ results ? Like, you get to see its weakness, name it and take +1 forward if you act on it.

As for the 7-9 results, they seem a bit harsh, like you didn't get a hit but missed instead. If you take a look at Hack & Slash 7-9 results, your enemy gets an attack against you (so potential damage here) but you still get to do your damage. That way, it feels more like a trade than a loss.

If instead you give a choice like :

On a 7-9 choose one :

• You spotted its weakness. Take +1 forward but he rammed you good, take 1d10 damage
• You spotted his weakness. Take +1 forward but he heals up 1d6 HP from goring you with is rune-etched horns.(I'd even go and say he heals up 6 HP)
• You avoided his charge but fell, hit yourself, lost balance, etc. You're stunned.(Here, stunned would mean you have to defy danger to do anything beside taking it easy and catch your breath.

Basically, I prefer 7-9 results to be an opportunity for me to make a soft move, to set something up. If on a hit, your enemy gets to do damage on you while you deal him none, what happens on a miss ? But that's just my taste. :)

GM: The minotaur points its horns at you and charge!
Player: OMG! I want to Defy Danger with Dex, sidestepping his charge! *rolls 5* NOES!
GM: Your sidestep was way to slow! The minotaur crashes into you with its mighty horns! You are hit for 7 damage and you fly through the room! The minotaur roars in triumph.

Minotaur weapons:
Halberd D8+1, close, reach.
+Horns 2d4+1, hand, piercing 1, forceful. Activated by player's miss.

Could work?

I agree with -t-; DW is great for being simple, adding a move for something already covered by a basic move seems a poor choice.
You could instead create a Minotaur move linked to charcter defy danger.
E.g.  6- minotaur hold 3 + damage / 7-9 hold 1 / 10+ no hold.
Minotaur can:

1) impale: mechanics that remove pg from battle for some time
2) stun: pg has stunned
3,4, etc.) other status effects,

My DM made a similar choice for a demonic succubus: her hold choices were (reduce damage), (stun pg) and (another choice i do not remember). She expended the holds the during the fight whenever it was necessary.

I think it is fun to have some special moves for the monsters that are activated by the character's failure, as that sort of opens them up for a nasty attack that fits with the fiction of either the character's move or something special about the monster.

Like a gorgon (like Medusa), that petrify people with a glare. When does this happen? What other attacks does it have? To make it simple, I wanted it to Death Glare whenever the players rolled 6-, otherwise it would attack with spells from range or use its tentacles in melee. Death Glare: Pick one of your limbs. It is now stone!

This way the players know something really bad will happen if they screw up and will aid each other to try avoid becoming statues (or some other bad stuff).

The trick is to not have too much of this, since the players need to gain xp by failing. It can be interesting for a "boss-fight" or similar.

A monster I used this last saturday was a Plant Zombie. It attacked with long claws, like branches. When the players rolled 6-, it ensnared them with roots and vines. It freaked them out and they didn't want to know what it would do after they got ensnared!

Monster Moves are GM moves. ie: when the players hand you a golden opportunity on a plate (a miss for example), make as hard a move as you'd like. Monster moves fit quite nicely into this category.

Custom moves are sweet for monsters or traps or enviroments "Dungeon Moves", that are in your prep and you'd rather not have to 'wing it' on the fly, though I quite enjoy working off narrative cues and tags myself, and generally make custom moves ad-hoc to antagonize the situation as the players discover our unfolding story through their moves and interaction with the dangers and threats. -t- and Lucacc give great examples of this in process. The Minotaur custom move is pretty sweet though.