New Skin - The Angelic

Here's a skin I've been kicking around since I was introduced to Monsterhearts at this past year's GenCon. I think I've finally gotten it to the stage of putting it up here and seeing what advice I can get from others.

I tried to avoid the temptation to make this skin simply a "good" version of the Infernal and went with something I think is a little more interesting. In high school terms, the Angelic is the holier-than-thou kid who looks down their nose at everyone, blind to their own faults. The douchebag angels of "Supernatural" also provided inspiration. Anyway, I think at this point I'm just stalling from actually posting, so here goes:

The Angelic

    There is darkness in this world. I mean real, true, honest-to-badness evil. The kind that most people can’t even imagine. But there’s also you. You may not like it, but there is something truly holy inside of you. You have been given the power to shine a light where there is darkness.

     But your power comes with a price: It’s your duty to put yourself in harm’s way so that others won’t have to. Should you choose to follow this obligation, life will undoubtedly become more difficult. But who knows what may happen if your turn your back on your destiny?


Name
Esther, David, Faith, Grace, Michael, Mohammad, Sterling, Sarah
A religious name, a brave name, a nurturing name, a name implying benevolence.

Look
Serene, otherworldly, protective, radiant, lordly
Watchful eyes, soothing eyes, bright eyes, distant eyes, worried eyes

Origin
Miracle-baby, Jesus freak, resurrected, nephilim, anointed, holy warrior

Stats
Hot +1, Cold -1, Volatile -1, Dark +1

Angelic Moves

Choose Two

Set an Example
     -When you successfully steer someone away from a given course of action, carry 1 forward to use toward your preferred course.

Holy Light
     -A radiant light fills you and can be projected out to burn the wicked. Roll with dark. On a 10 and up, you inflict one harm to the target and gain a string on them. On a 7-9, choose to either inflict the harm or take the string.

Glare of Judgment
     -When you shut someone down, roll with dark.

Sanctuary
     -You have an area of holy ground that strengthens and sustains you. Add one to all rolls when using Angelic moves there.

Higher Power
     -You answer to a more powerful being (decide the exact nature of your superior). When you gaze into the abyss add the following option to the 7 - 9 list: “Your superior gives you a mission. If you perform the task well and promptly, mark experience. If you fail, gain the condition Disappointment.”

To Err is Human
     -When you first witness someone doing something you don’t approve of, take a string on them.

To Forgive Divine
     -You may spend strings you have on another character to remove strings they have on you, 1-for-1.

Your Backstory

Someone knows about your true nature and wants to use it for their own ends. They gain a string on you.

Someone believes you can save them. Gain a string on them.

Advancement
You attract a Congregation of Believers.

Sex Move
When you have sex, if it was motivated by positive feelings (like love or at least fondness), heal all of your partner’s wounds and cure all of their conditions. If the sex was motivated by negative feelings (such as jealousy or anger) your darkest self is triggered.

Darkest Self
It’s no use. The world is too diseased, too impure. Your efforts until now have been a drop in the bucket, a finger in the dam. You’ll never push back the evil around you unless you are willing to resort to drastic measures. From now on, the kid gloves come off. From now on all evil – no matter how “minor” it may be – must burn! You escape your darkest self when you go too far and harm an innocent.

So what do folks think. I worry that some of the moves might be overpowered (Holy Light and To Forgive Divine in particular).

Hmm... Didn't see the "reverent" skin down below until after I posted this.

I love the "intro text", love the names, love the looks, and love the origins. Those are genius and shouldn't change at all. I have some thoughts about the moves though.

Set an Example:
I'm not entirely sure what the idea is here. "Carry 1 forward towards your preferred course"? What does that mean? I'm really confused about what "your preferred course" is. Are you saying that the Angelic gets +1 when demonstrating the "correct" course of action to someone they think has strayed? If that's the case,  could you say something like this:

"When you demonstrate the correct course of action to someone you've marked as a sinner, add one to your rolls."

Holy Light:
I think I would add a some fiction here. More about the trigger condition, like "When you use your holy light to smite the wicked…" That's suggests more about how the Angelic uses their power.

Also, the gaining of a String on a 7-9 result feels kind of powerful to me. I think that instead of the Angelic choosing what option they get (String or harm), it should be the target's choice. Do _they_ want to take harm or give you a String?

Sanctuary:
I think you need to rename this one (it's the same as the Witch's move) and tell us more about it. What kind of things does the Angelic _do_ in their sanctuary? What is it for? I would give the Angelic a +1 bonus to all rolls related to that thing or task while in their sanctuary.

Higher Power:
Why add that option to the 7-9 list? Being given a task that'll earn you XP sounds like it'd be a 10 up option to me. Also, I think the (decide the exact nature of your superior) is kind of weak. Is the Skin meant to be an angel or not? If they're an angel, we know exactly who their superior is, they just might go by different names in different circles.

To Err is Human:
This sounds really abusable. What's preventing the Angelic from saying that _everything_ they witness that's "bad" is something they don't approve of? They'd have Strings on everyone. I think you need to narrow this down.

Why not really push the angel theme here and have the Angelic pick one of the seven deadly sins. Then give them a String when they see someone doing something they don't approve of related to that sin. In fact, why not have the Angelic choose a sin and a virtue during character creation (put the lists under the name section). Then tie the sin to the Set an Example, Holy Light, and To Err is Human moves.

To Forgive Divine:
I don't really see much "forgiveness" going on here. Plus, with the Angelic's +1 Hot score, I don't think anyone will ever have String on the character; they'll just turn people on and use those Strings to clear themselves. I would name this "Burning Bridges" or something similar.

Thanks for the advice. Reworking the moves now. And I'm glad you liked the "background" sections. My strength in gaming has always been more on the story side than the rules side.