Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer

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Canoy

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Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer
« on: November 11, 2012, 03:57:19 PM »
Salutations!, glorious people of the post-apocalyptic persuasion. I recently partook in a campaign under the blistering sun and around the drying well, where the hardholder used his control of the only water supply along the Well-Fare to oppress and exploit the people who needed water to sustain their farms and other livelyhoods. The scarcity of fairness made me ponder about the untapped niche that is the bulwark of justice - though not necessarily the moral compass. Therefore, I now present to you, the Shieldbearer, a playbook for those that hold traditions and justice in high regard. It is still in the playtest-phase, for several reasons. Firstly, I am unsure whether or not it contains moves which crosses rather than skirts the line of narrative control. Secondly, I would like this community's input on its place in the transgressing narrative of Apocalypse World - does a playbook which latches on to tradition have any place in the maelstrom-permeated post-apocalypse? Thirdly, I want feedback regarding the coherence of the playbook - does it adhere to its theme throughout? And finally, it would be grand to hear any other thoughts that spring to your mind.



« Last Edit: November 11, 2012, 06:57:57 PM by Canoy »

Re: Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2012, 10:05:13 PM »
1) Keeper of the old ways bothers me in that forcing too much of a PC's action - particularly in that it seems unnecessary, in that the first two you could accomplish in some kind of of modification to Read a Person.

2) The playbook fits pretty well in AW. Its definitely reads as a justice-oriented character FROM THE APOCALYPSE, as opposed to, "oh hey there's a cop in the group."

It loses points from not having anything to do with bondage masks or psychadelic horror or apocalypse bubble bath or burning man, though.

If there's something that I would criticize on a conceptual level, its that I think the moves define too much of the internal beliefs of a character - Compared to say, the Hocus or the Touchstone, which also imply internal beliefs for the character, but define the character morever on what they are capable of doing - leaving how they want to use that power more in the hands of the player.

3) The playbooks stuff seems to hit the theme pretty well.

4) I like Getting Shit Done a lot, its probably my favorite Move for the book. I would actually suggest changing the special move to ("When someone has sex with you, they tell you of an injustice committed against them, and Getting Shit Done is triggered, whether you have the move or not.")

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Canoy

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Re: Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer
« Reply #2 on: November 12, 2012, 12:05:16 PM »
Quote from: evilseanbot
1) Keeper of the old ways bothers me in that forcing too much of a PC's action - particularly in that it seems unnecessary, in that the first two you could accomplish in some kind of of modification to Read a Person.

True; I was going for a situation in which sermons resulted in actions by the listener, rather than the ability of the Shieldbearer to read a person. There's a fundamental difference in forcing the truth and spotting the lie, though I'm not confortable with forcing other PCs to do what you want, outside of going aggro. I'm also a fan of that type of hold-mechanic, but perhaps I should turn the table so that the one affacted spends the hold, as well as trying to distinguish it more from what is possible with read a person.
Quote from: evilseanbot
2) The playbook fits pretty well in AW. Its definitely reads as a justice-oriented character FROM THE APOCALYPSE, as opposed to, "oh hey there's a cop in the group."

It loses points from not having anything to do with bondage masks or psychadelic horror or apocalypse bubble bath or burning man, though.

Thanks! It might be difficult to find a good balance of bondage-y stuff, as "masked crime fighter" is a stereotype that might come up if it isn't handled well. I can't say I understand the "apocalypse bubble bath or burning man"-reference, though.

Quote from: evilseanbot
If there's something that I would criticize on a conceptual level, its that I think the moves define too much of the internal beliefs of a character - Compared to say, the Hocus or the Touchstone, which also imply internal beliefs for the character, but define the character morever on what they are capable of doing - leaving how they want to use that power more in the hands of the player.

Are you thinking of any moves specifically? Shield of Conviction fits the bill - it internalises and incentivisesusing force in the name of justice. Perhaps a more neutral phrasing, such as "do battle to settle scores", or something similar?

Keeper... also fits the bill, but it needs redesigning. Is there any other move which fits the bill?


Quote from: evilseanbot
3) The playbooks stuff seems to hit the theme pretty well.

Great! If you have any suggestions regarding symbols of authority which could broaden the playbook's scope, or add some of that bondage/psychadelic horror, I'm all for it.

Quote from: evilseanbot
4) I like Getting Shit Done a lot, its probably my favorite Move for the book. I would actually suggest changing the special move to ("When someone has sex with you, they tell you of an injustice committed against them, and Getting Shit Done is triggered, whether you have the move or not.")


The Special move I've settled with is one I thought reflected human nature - the rose-tinted glasses, so to speak. It was designed before Getting Shit Done, so I hadn't considered combining them.

Shieldbearer changelog
  • Added some Look
  • Added a few lines to the Special move
  • Removed the possibility of improving sharp, but added weird, as without it players would be less inclined to open their brain.
  • Changed Keeper of the Old Ways. Thought long on what it was about it that I liked, so now it  reads as follows:

"When you proclaim the truths of old to another PC, roll+hard. On 10+, hold 2. On 7-9, hold 1, but they get 1 hold on you too on the same terms. You can spend hold, 1 for 1, to make that PC help or interfere with you, their choice. As they do, you mark Hx.
On a miss, you take -1ongoing till you take a bullet with their name on or till they are show their true colors."
« Last Edit: November 12, 2012, 04:21:39 PM by Canoy »

Re: Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer
« Reply #3 on: November 12, 2012, 01:50:02 PM »
Surprisingly fitting and evocative! I do think you should be able to have your gender concealed for your look though. I love that it's a class that's not monstrous in a fight yet is connected to violence.

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Canoy

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Re: Playbook Playtest: The Shieldbearer
« Reply #4 on: November 14, 2012, 06:56:12 AM »
Updated version can be found here: clicky.

Not many changes made since a few days ago. I might be a bit blind to my own text, so if no more critique is raised before the weekend, I'll consider it done.